I like books. I keep a steady flow of them coming from Amazon by post and I harvest sackfuls from the local library sale room. Going through the shelves where they pile up fast, I discover that I have a lot of books that I haven’t read. While quite a few are strictly entertainment, such as the 70 or so Robert Parker novels, many are more challenging. Many books that I find on my shelves reflect topics of art, literature, history, philosophy, artificial intelligence research, social research, and the unifying principals of science. Most of these reflect the interest of the person I would like to be and therefor are not all read. All of the Parker books have been read at least once.
I have a stack of drawing pads along with all sorts of pens, pencils and fancy erasers. Some of my pads are filled with a mixture of notes, journal like entries, and drawings. I find that I use drawing to think about how to make something more than to make representations of the world I see around me; although there are drawings that are studies of real objects. I have acquired this stack of pads while thinking I “ought” to draw more. I think I would draw more if I didn’t feel so pretentious doing so in public.
I have acquired exercise equipment and watched it languish in a corner gathering dust until I stored it under the eaves or donated it to Goodwill or Habitat. I have gathered bicycles and dispersed them most of my adult life. Thinking each time that I would ride for exercise and pleasure.
I have bought old British sports cars thinking I would restore them and use them as daily drivers. Only once did that actually happen and that caused my wife distress each time she had to drive my “Bug-eyed” Sprite. The beautiful maroon and silver Austin Healey 3000 spent most of our life together sitting in the driveway waiting for one part or another.
These things come from a longing to be more or better, or both. They are signs indicating direction from who I am to the person I would like to become. Just as the volunteer work for the Red Cross or the local Volunteer Fire and Rescue Squad points in a direction.
I could go on about vegetable gardening, blacksmithing, stone carving, Arduino robotics, Android application development and other interests but the point for me is that there is only so much time and so much energy that I have to spend each day. Choosing just a few is the hardest thing for me. I know that I am very lucky to have such a problem.
Lame Duck 